Intentionality
by paradoxicalconundrum
Summary: An impromptu assignment from Roger leads Matt to some very interesting conclusions. eventual MattxMello


This Matt is very much inspired by SatreProxy's Matt in Mello's Guide to Girls. It is very old, and I am thinking it probably won't be updated again, but I suggest everyone check it out anyway, he/she is a very talented author(ess) and I laughed my ass off while reading it.

As you must already know, I don't own Death Note.

Now onto the story!

_**Intentionality**_

_**Chapter 1: **_

_**Exposition**_

Dear Everyone,

If you are reading this, please put it down. Its not for your eyes.

Dear Mello,

If you are reading this, GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY ROOM AND AWAY FROM MY SHIT YOU LTTLE SNOOP!

Dear Diary...

Oh what the fuck, who am I fooling. This ain't a diary and it aint some shit blog. This is my life. Haha... That makes me sound so serious! For real though...

Bet you're wondering who I am and what exactly you're reading, you little snoop. You shouldn't be reading. But alas, chances are if you have this and have gotten this far I'm probably dead. So it really doesn't matter that you're intruding on my private thoughts-my travelogue if you will.

Oh, right. I'm Matt.

And I do have a point to all this incessant rambling, and it's not just to show off my (clearly superior to Near) extensive vocabulary.

And its not just to impress Mello.

And its not just to waste time while my DS is recharging. I can't believe I let it get that low in the first place, but thats what I get for not paying as close attention to it and watching other... things instead.

(I'll leave that one up to your imagination)

As for the DS, don't hate. Dragon Quest is the shit, and everyone needs to go for a hardcore RPG thats not Final Fantasy every once in a while.

Besides, some of the new handheld games are as intricate as those for my Wii...

(and don't worry, there will be plenty of jokes for that one later)

and my Playstation and xbox...

(NOT THAT WII)... perverts.

And sometimes you just need to chill out and not think and save some princesses. And I definitely have not forgotten what exactly the plot of Dragon Quest is because I (may have been) running around so long that I can (obviously not) remember the stupid objectives-

Right, the point to this. Oh shit, I think I need a cigarette.

…..

This is for Roger. He thinks I might get a little more motivated if I write my thoughts down. Kudos to him though, I think this is the first time I've ever even attempted to do a homework assignment.

And you wonder why I'm only third in line to be the next L...

Homework gets in the way of real life... of GAME TIME!

But anyway...

I am going to tell you a story. Of love of loss of betrayal... who the fuck am I kidding? Its just the over-imagined life of a red-head gamer who has a slight affinity for hacking.

Its the hacking that gets you into trouble.

"Hey Matt!" That's Mello calling... He's my roommate. Suitemate. Apartment-mate...

Fuck it. We live together.

But thats mostly not my fault. It was Roger.

Fuck, he might read this. No way.

But we're not gay. Not yet anyway. Its a work in progress, a delicate situation. And sometimes alcohol is involved...

Not really. But it will be. When we grow up beyond 13, beyond how old we are now, beyond how much we think we're grown now.

Thank you for reminding me I'm still technically a minor. But I can leave Wammy's in two years and be legal in three.

So suck it, asshole.

"Whatcha up to?" Mello is sitting next to me now. He has blond hair. Its kinda long and slightly girlish.

"YOU DID NOT JUST WRITE THAT MY HAIR IS GIRLISH!" I'm glaring at Mello now.

"Did you read the top of the page? It says FUCK OFF." haha take that.

"No, dumbass. You're typing two pages down now. What are you doing anyway?"

"I'm writing. Keeping track of whats going on in my life and such. Roger's making me."

"And you're doing it?" Mello looked at me incredulously, "and you know what incredulously means?"

"Fuck off Mello, of course I do. I'm third, right behind you."

"So you're writing everything I say."

"Yes."

"Matt's a loser! He has ugly red hai—-"

vfrg;oiewackrooeanmaklvcoa-

That up there is a note from Mello.

He left to go early to dinner. I didn't try and beat him with my gameboy.

That would have ended poorly for my gameboy, and I would never risk its life like that. Who knows when I would get a new one.

Speaking of dinner, I should probably go catch him and tell him that I'm not angry with him. Because I'm really not.

I just don't want to admit all the things Roger has over my head thats making me even attempt to write this...

Speaking of Roger, I hope he never reads this either. I feel like that would suck worse for me than not doing the assignment at all...

MATT LEVELS UP!

So what do you think? Let me know in a review or PM! Thanks!

paradoxicalconundrum


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